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:iconinfinessence: More from infinessence


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December 22, 2008
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Just a memory, sweeping through me.  Something incomplete.  Burning under my eyes as I write.  There’s a lightness in my feet, a hole forming where my throat should be.

Simple little things, tinted with sunset colors.  That white frame signifies its age.  They’re all of things I haven’t seen before…yet I have.  Somewhere in that missing part of me.  It’s only then that I realize that something is gone, or maybe never there.

It’s not like I was there for it, anyway.  That’s when you know how much heart they hold.  How important they are…photos have never moved me, you know.  I tend to find them boring.  But these little thumbnails, not tangible, choke me with their soul.  Maybe I’ve found…

An unknown part of myself in shower drains and blurry head shots.  A memory of that camera, those ancient portraits of parents and grandfathers.  It was pink with multicolored flowers, new really.  The film was old and corrupted, and always ruined the picture somehow.  The ink wouldn’t develop fully.

But I loved watching the colors move and fade into a bookmarked reality.  I loved knowing that he’d touched them, what felt like eons ago.  But it wasn’t photos of things I know, not now.  It was the memory that I’d taken them; that they’d been brought back.  Random faces, with captions written neatly on the bottom.  I see my sloppy cursive ghosted over them.  A memory of years I had and didn’t have and are gone, now.  

This is what sadness is made of.
This stint of emotion came when I was looking at some Polaroid-style deviations earlier today. I knew that I had to write while the emotion inside was fresh and I didn't edit it, so forgive me if some things are cloudy. I was going for a "raw" feel. :D

I sure miss my grandfather that I never knew...
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:iconsockstealingnome:
sockstealingnome Featured By Owner Jun 29, 2009
Polaroids make me sad too. They're a thing of the past. I always wanted one and now they've been discontinued.
Reply
:iconinfinessence:
infinessence Featured By Owner Jun 30, 2009  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Really? I thought they still used Polaroids at crime scenes and such, but perhaps they've upgraded since then.
Reply
:iconsockstealingnome:
sockstealingnome Featured By Owner Jun 30, 2009
I have no clue what police do.
Reply
:iconevync:
EvynC Featured By Owner Jan 1, 2009
wow, that was very provocative
Reply
:iconinfinessence:
infinessence Featured By Owner Jan 1, 2009  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Really? :D In a good way, right?
Reply
:iconevync:
EvynC Featured By Owner Jan 3, 2009
Of course:aww:
Reply
:iconhidden-daisy-valley:
Hidden-Daisy-Valley Featured By Owner Dec 22, 2008
This was good; I could relate to it. Are you going to edit?
Reply
:iconinfinessence:
infinessence Featured By Owner Dec 22, 2008  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Perhaps! this emotion really got me when I was looking at a dA news article, actually. It featured Polaroid-style photos...
Reply
:iconhidden-daisy-valley:
Hidden-Daisy-Valley Featured By Owner Dec 23, 2008
I like that style:)
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:iconinfinessence:
infinessence Featured By Owner Dec 25, 2008  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Yay! I did something right, then!
Reply
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